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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • Dems & Pubs Battle Over Food Stamps [semi-satire]

    02/18/2018 10:55:51 AM PST · by John Semmens · 5 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 Feb 2018 | John Semmens
    In a proposal dubbed “America’s Harvest Box,” President Trump’s new budget calls for replacing half of the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) vouchers with actual food for 80% of the program’s recipients. The “box” would contain allotments of shelf-stable milk, ready to eat cereals, pasta, peanut butter, beans and canned fruit and vegetables. Democrats were quick to attack the plan. Michigan Sen Debbie Stabenow, the ranking Democrat on the agriculture committee, labeled it “not a serious proposal.” Rep Jim McGovern (D-Mass) called it “a cruel joke. It unfairly limits the choices of those dependent on the government for their living....
  • When the Idiots Are At the Gate, Don’t Open the Gate

    02/18/2018 7:23:59 AM PST · by NOBO2012 · 16 replies
    MOTUS A.D. ^ | 2-18-18 | MOTUS
    We’re making progress. We’ve gone from a hysterical “Trump colluded with the Russians to steal the election” to this, from Jerry Nadler: NADLER: My reaction to the news is this is absolute proof of what we knew all along and what the president has denied, namely that we were attacked. This is a very serious attack against the United States by a hostile foreign power, an attack against our election process, our entire governing process. We know that the attack is continuing. And that our intelligence agencies tell us that it’s going to certainly continue through the next election. And...
  • The Week in Review: The Fake News Media’s Fakest Week Ever

    02/18/2018 5:36:55 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 11 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) This past week saw the fake news media have what probably was its fakest week ever – which is saying an awful lot – and here a few of the highlights: The fake news media, lacking any other negative story on which to focus in order to avoid reporting on the massive, mushrooming scandal of corruption at DOJ and the FBI, spent the first several days of the week hammering the Rob Porter story. While Porter’s likely a wife-abusing turd who needed to be fired and needs to be punished, that hardly...
  • How white nationalists fooled the media about Florida shooter

    02/17/2018 5:33:08 PM PST · by spintreebob · 26 replies
    politico.com color of change.org ^ | 2-16-2018 | Shawn Musgrave
    ABC, AP and others ran with false information on shooter’s ties to extremist groups. Following misrepresentations by a white nationalist leader and coordinated efforts by internet trolls, numerous researchers and media outlets spread a seemingly false claim that the man charged with killing more than a dozen people at a Florida high school belonged to an extremist group. Law enforcement agencies say they have no evidence so far to support this claim, and the rumor appears to have been perpetrated by white nationalist trolls themselves.
  • FBI Whiffs on School Shooting [semi-satire]

    02/17/2018 1:15:37 PM PST · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 Feb 2018 | John Semmens
    This week, Nikolas Cruz killed 17 and wounded another 13 in an assault on the students and faculty of Marjory Stoneman High School in Parkland, Florida. By law, the school is a designated “gun free zone.” This ensured that Cruz would be able to fire at will until off-site police arrived, which they did within five minutes of being called. By that time the 19-year-old Cruz had ditched his weapon and blended in with the fleeing students. Cruz’s heinous plan was months in the making. Back on September 5, 2017 Cruz posted a YouTube boast “I’m going to be a...
  • Oprah Says She Won't Run for President [semi-satire]

    02/17/2018 9:32:20 AM PST · by John Semmens · 6 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 Feb 2018 | John Semmens
    Daytime TV personality Oprah Winfrey's assertion that she will not run for president in 2020 "because if God actually wanted me to run, wouldn't God kinda tell me? And I haven't heard that. I had a lot of wealthy men calling, telling me that they would run my campaign and raise $1 billion for me, but it's just not in my spirit." Joy Behar, a panelist on ABC's The View talk show, called Oprah's remarks "insane. It's the kind of thing we'd expect to come out of Vice-President Pence's mouth. What can she be thinking putting the imaginary words of...
  • The Truth Is Out There

    02/17/2018 7:02:56 AM PST · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    MOTUS A.D. ^ | 2-17-18 | MOTUS
    My only love sprung from my only hate! Too early seen unknown, and known too late! - Romeo and Juliet: Act I, scene V The truth is out there but you’ll have to ferret it out on you own. The Left is too busy using the tragedy in Parkland to woo voters, raise money and castigate their opponents again as knuckle-dragging Neanderthals hauling 21st century “assault” weapons around.Among the whoppers that have already been debunked: 1. that Nikolas Cruz was a white nationalist, 2. this was the 18th school shooting in the U.S. this year – a claim so...
  • In Light of the Mueller Indictments, When Will We Get a Special Counsel to go After George Soros?

    02/17/2018 5:03:32 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 29 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) After all the hysteria over guns on the cable fake news networks this week, here’s a reality check from our friends in the Great White North of Minnesota: WCCO CBS Minnesota reports that record numbers of Minnesotans now own guns, record numbers of Minnesotans now have concealed carry permits, and the state’s violent crime rate hit a new all-time record low in 2017. That’s the reality of gun ownership in America: The more people who own guns and have permits to carry, the lower the violent crime rate becomes. Since concealed carry...
  • Court Says Muslim Travel Ban Unconstitutional [semi-satire]

    02/17/2018 12:19:22 AM PST · by John Semmens · 6 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 Feb 2018 | John Semmens
    This week the 4th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals voted 9-4 to overturn President Trump's anti-terrorist travel ban from eight countries on the grounds that "it violates the First Amendment's guarantee of religious freedom. The President's assumption that the Muslim call for jihad from its adherents empowers him to block the immigration of practitioners of this religion into this country is mistaken. The protection of the First Amendment is absolute. It allows no exception for religious practices that entail violence. To single out one religion merely because it commands the coercion or murder of unbelievers is, therefore, unconstitutional." Chief Judge...
  • The First Step to Preventing More School Shootings: Remove the FBI From the Equation

    02/16/2018 10:58:07 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 60 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    The Evening Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) While advocates on both sides of the largely-irrelevant gun control issue are talking past one another every hour on the hour on all the cable TV networks, one way to really, truly improve on the current system for preventing such acts in the future is becoming crystal clear: The FBI must be removed from the equation. First, let’s look at this killer’s background: - Law enforcement had had to be called to his home an almost unbelievable 39 times during the four years leading up to Wednesday’s act of mass murder;...
  • FLOTUS Friday: Post-Valentine Edition

    02/16/2018 6:09:32 AM PST · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    MOTUS A.D. ^ | 2-16-18 | MOTUS
    It’s been a long week and I think we could all use a palate cleanser. How about FLOTUS visiting sick children at the National Institute of Health to pass out Valentines and make cookies?The media coverage was predictable, as usual: Melania Trump was feeling the love on Valentine's Day in $2,995 Calvin Klein look. [Imagine that, wife of billionaire wears designer coat.] Melania Trump Spends Valentine's Day with Ill Kids as Husband's Lawyer Admits He Paid Off Porn Star. [Guess what? We still don’t care.] And my personal favorite: Twitter calls her out for not wishing her husband a happy...
  • The Senate’s Predictable Abject Failure on Immigration Shows Democrats Aren’t Our Only Problem

    02/16/2018 5:19:50 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 9 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) Do Democrat candidates really want to stake their prospects on San Fran Nan? – The demented face of the Democrat Party was on full display for reporters yesterday, as San Fran Nan stuttered, stammered, spasmed, muttered and facial ticked her way through a press availability. The American Mirror captures the horror show that the rest of the fake news media refuses to report on. This is who Democrats want to replace Paul Ryan as Speaker of the House next year. Frightening. Man, nobody could’ve seen this one coming. Oh, wait…: With Mitt...
  • It May Be Time to Disband the FBI and Start Over

    02/15/2018 5:34:10 PM PST · by EyesOfTX · 52 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    The Evening Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) The news that the FBI was actually warned last September about the Florida school killer who won’t be named here has me seriously thinking that lopping the top brass off the nation’s supposed “premier law enforcement agency” just isn’t going to be enough to salvage the Bureau’s viability going forward. No, considering the Bureau’s long and growing record of consistently failing to stop tragedies from taking place, and it’s growing number of examples of bullying behavior and corruption, it may seriously be time to disband the entire thing and start over....
  • A Fish Tail

    02/15/2018 6:36:21 AM PST · by NOBO2012 · 7 replies
    MOTUS A.D. ^ | 2-15-18 | MOTUS
    Another big one that got away: like many before him, yesterday’s killer was “known to the FBI.” Last fall, a Mississippi bail bondsman and frequent YouTube vlogger noticed an alarming comment left on one of his videos. "I'm going to be a professional school shooter," said a user named Nikolas Cruz. The YouTuber, 36-year-old Ben Bennight, alerted the FBI, emailing a screenshot of the comment to the bureau's tips account… Agents with the bureau's Mississippi field office got back to him "immediately," Bennight said, and conducted an in-person interview the following day, on Sept. 25. – BuzzFeed I can...
  • A Florida Tragedy Overshadows Schiff and Fauxcahontas

    02/15/2018 5:14:49 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 3 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) Tired of all this Winning yet? – The new Morning Consult Poll is out, and guess what? It now has the Republicans leading the Democrats in the generic congressional ballot for the first time in more than a year. The Ds led the Rs by 10 as recently as December 18. Meanwhile, President Trump’s job approval rating shot up in this poll, to 47% approve vs. 47% disapprove. Hey, remember all those breathless predictions in the fake news media of a Democrat tidal wave election coming in the November mid-terms? Yeah, we’re...
  • General Mike Flynn is not Going Softly Into That Good Night

    02/14/2018 2:10:51 PM PST · by EyesOfTX · 26 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    The Evening Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) Let’s play a little timeline game here: 12.1.2017 – General Mike Flynn, after being hounded, having his family threatened and driven to near-bankruptcy for months by Special Counsel Robert Mueller and his gang of Clinton/Obama hacks, enters a guilty plea for having lied to the FBI in a surprise January 24 interview that was conducted by FBI Deep State agent Peter Strzok and two other agents. 12.7.2017 – The judge who received that plea, Judge Rudolph Contreras – who also happens to be a FISA Court judge – was removed from...
  • Valentine’s Day

    02/14/2018 7:13:46 AM PST · by NOBO2012 · 8 replies
    MOTUS A.D. ^ | 2-14-18 | MOTUS
    Is Valentine’s Day not the best made-up holiday ever? It’s a fake holiday for lovers: lovers of flowers, chocolates, puppies…no matter who or what you love there’s something for everyone.Flowers:Puppies:Flower Puppies:Chocolates:Puppies:Chocolate Puppies: And even lovers of sentimental thoughts: But if you still can’t think of a reason to celebrate St. Valentine’s Day, tell me this isn’t reason enough?Now get out there, wear your heart on your butt,and have yourself a merry little holiday…with chocolate. Regardless of it’s race, color, sex or national origin. Sure it’s messy, but what have you got to lose? It’s all good. And I know it’s...
  • .50 Cal my Tail Light

    02/14/2018 7:01:42 AM PST · by w1n1 · 19 replies
    Am Shooting Journal ^ | 2/14/2018 | J Hines
    Getting a new gun for Christmas is great, but sometimes you gotta know how not to shoot your new .50 cal. You need to take into account of where you take your first shot. This is a funny example of how not to shoot your new .50 Cal. With a .50 cal you have to be aware to stay clear of the area from all four directions, not just in front of the barrel. The shooting itself is actually pretty good, especially when you consider that the shooter is 70 years old. Even if you weren't lucky enough to get...
  • Don't try this Gun Disarm

    02/14/2018 5:16:01 AM PST · by w1n1 · 10 replies
    Am Shooting Journal ^ | 2/14/2018 | J Hines
    Happy Hump Day & Valentine Day to all. Lets start it off with this really dumb ass martial arts. If you want to learn how to disarm someone that has a gun pointed at you. Learn from a certified instructor, not from the internet like this video. The internet is a beautiful thing, full of knowledge and crap. If you watch this horrendous gun disarm against two guns and think this is the real McCoy, you’re on your way to the grave. Watch this video as a form of entertainment. Seriously folks don’t try this at home. Watch this hilarious...
  • Donald Trump Just Keeps on Winning, and Pelosi and Schumer Have no Answer to it

    02/14/2018 5:01:06 AM PST · by EyesOfTX · 29 replies
    DB Daily Update ^ | David Blackmon
    Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) Tired of all this Winning yet? Part I – The Democrats are starting to have second thoughts about their “all Trump hate, all the time” fake strategy for prevailing in this year’s mid-term elections. McClatchy News reports that, as the Rasmussen survey has the President’s approval rating hovering near 50%, the Democrats’ own internal polling has his standing now at 44%, up from 40% in November. Even worse for the Dems, their generic congressional polling has them now sitting with just a 46-42 advantage, less than half of their edge just a...