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Humor (General/Chat)

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  • Elizabeth Warren to introduce the 'Accountable Capitalism Act'

    08/15/2018 8:04:42 PM PDT · by Beave Meister · 62 replies
    The Washington Examiner ^ | 8/15/2018 | Pete Kasperowicz
    Sen. Elizabeth Warren, D-Mass., will introduce legislation Wednesday aimed at making the nation's largest companies accountable to employees and their local communities, not just shareholders. In an op-ed for the Wall Street Journal, Warren said companies in the late 20th Century started operating in a way that made them slaves to shareholders. "That shift has had a tremendous effect on the economy," she wrote. "In the early 1980s, large American companies sent less than half their earnings to shareholders, spending the rest on their employees and other priorities." "But between 2007 and 2016, large American companies dedicated 93% of their...
  • Signs for IDIOTS

    08/15/2018 6:10:01 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 27 replies
    email from a friend | 8/15/2018 | unknown
    Number One Idiot: I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right...
  • Today's Toons 8/15/18

    08/15/2018 1:23:39 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 27 replies
    The Politics Forums ^ | 8/15/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • From the Memory Hole: Clinton, Obama return to public eye with new ventures

    08/14/2018 7:50:50 PM PDT · by Steely Tom · 5 replies
    Fox News Politics ^ | 3 May 2017 | Judson Berger
    Only 468 days ago, this interesting story hit the internet, via Fox News. In those early, heady days of Trump Derangement Syndrome, Barack unveiled a model of the "Obama Presidential Center," which was to cover 17 acres of Jackson Park with about 200,000 square feet of office, library, and "communing spaces," and includes a 22-story-tall tower. Mrs. Clinton's "ventures" are a bit less ambitious, and consist mainly of announcing that she's working on a book (probably the one that became What Happened) and that she's available for speaking engagements; the article helpfully includes the name of the speaker's bureau that's...
  • Senior Smiles

    08/14/2018 11:55:22 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 19 replies
    "The Pond" An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple, and peach trees. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it...
  • Today's Toons 8/14/18

    08/14/2018 3:20:31 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 16 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 8/14/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • The story of Fred and Esther (clips from Sanford and Son)

    08/13/2018 7:55:44 AM PDT · by simpson96 · 17 replies
    Youtube ^ | 11/14/2016 | Rasta Gideon Positive Vibration
  • Ocasio-Cortez Appears On ‘Sesame Street’ To Debate Economic Plan With The Count-SATIRE

    08/13/2018 5:00:47 AM PDT · by fungoking · 7 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | 8/10/18 | Staff
    NEW YORK, NY—Star Democratic political candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez finally accepted a challenge to debate her economic plan with Count von Count, esteemed number expert from Sesame Street, on a special guest appearance that aired Friday. The congressional candidate got into a heated exchange with the legendary counting expert, fumbling her words as he calmly tallied up the trillions of dollars she hadn’t accounted for in her proposals. “The number of the day is… 30 trillion dollars! Ah! Ah! Ah!” the Count began in his opening statement, as a number “30” puppet followed by a bunch of zeroes started dancing behind...
  • Today's Toons 8/13/18

    08/13/2018 1:30:01 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 17 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 8/13/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Ocasio-Cortez: Cut All Spending on Defense!

    08/12/2018 10:45:36 AM PDT · by Bon mots · 74 replies
    http://imgur.com ^ | August 12, 2018 | Bon Mots
    Ocasio-Cortez is a gift to the Republican party. The jokes just write themselves!
  • What Would Be The Ideal Wife? How Should She Treat Her Husband?

    08/12/2018 9:27:30 AM PDT · by Architect of Avalon · 72 replies
    Architect of Avalon ^ | 8/12/2018 | Architect of Avalon
    Please answer the title question with as many points as you can come up with. What interpersonal dynamics and actions would make the husband the happiest? Additionally, what would the ideal husband be like, and how should he treat his wife?
  • Political joke.

    08/12/2018 8:53:10 AM PDT · by gattaca · 13 replies
    Dear Abby, My husband hasn’t worked for the last 14 years. All he does is get dressed in the morning and hop in his fancy car to visit his cronies. I know he’s cheated on me many times with young girls who could be his granddaughters. I know this because he brags about this to me. He smokes fancy cigars and drinks the most expensive liquor day and night. We sleep in separate beds because he tells me he knows I’m a lesbian and besides that, my varicose veins and fat behind turns him off. > > Should I clobber...
  • 7 Things All Zodiac Signs Should Avoid Doing During The August 2018 Partial Solar Eclipse

    08/12/2018 8:25:10 AM PDT · by DUMBGRUNT · 22 replies
    Bustle ^ | 11 Aug 2018 | Brandi Neal
    Solar eclipses are ideal for reflection, releasing things that no longer serve you, and for setting intentions. They are not a time for action. No matter how tempted you are to begin something new today, don't. Am I saying that nothing that begins on an eclipse can go well?
  • 1996 Staples "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year" Back-to-School Commercial

    08/12/2018 7:32:33 AM PDT · by DoodleBob · 31 replies
    Youtube ^ | 1996 | Staples
    Staples 1996 Back to School commercial featuring a Christmas classic as the soundtrack, a happy parent, and glum kids.
  • Tale of a Tesla Model 3 Trip [vanity]

    08/10/2018 6:18:40 PM PDT · by logi_cal869 · 63 replies
    self | 08/10/2018 | self
    A guy I know harbors the atypical lefty viewpoints on climate, government, the right, etc. Liberalism in general, but totally hypocritical on other issues such as trade and firearms. He & his wife put deposits on twin Model 3s and wait...and wait...and wait...until finally they got theirs earlier this year. One day I noticed that his old car was being driven so I poked around and got the skinny: His brand-spankin-new Model 3 was taken for a cross-country trip and ended up with a very minor problem which any mechanic could have fixed in 30 minutes. In this case, it...
  • Report: Christians Who Regularly Share Photos Of Bible, Coffee Significantly Godlier

    08/10/2018 4:34:17 PM PDT · by OddLane · 29 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | August 10, 2018 | Babylon Bee
    NASHVILLE, TN—LifeWay Research released a new report Monday morning confirming that Christians who regularly share photos on social media which include both a Bible and a cup of coffee are significantly godlier than those who do not. The data was gathered from a study of 8,000 Christians from a variety of denominations and backgrounds. It reports “much higher” levels of godliness and holiness among those who share at least one Bible/coffee pic per week, along with “significantly elevated” levels of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. A higher frequency of sharing this specific type of image...
  • Four Husbands

    08/10/2018 10:34:00 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 14 replies
    email from a friend | 8/10/2018 | unknown
    Subject: 4 Husbands 4 Husbands The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation. "He's a funeral director," she answered. "Interesting," the newsman thought. He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a...
  • Friday Fun

    08/10/2018 3:32:44 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 13 replies
    email from a friend | 8/10/2018 | unknown
    THE BOTTLE OF WINE For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, or wish you weren't married, this is something to smile about the next time you see a bottle of wine: Tom was driving home from a business trip in Northern Arizona when he saw an elderly Navajo man walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet one, he stopped the car and asked the Navajo man if he would like a ride. With a silent nod of thanks, the man got into the car. Resuming the...
  • Today's Toons 8/10/18

    08/10/2018 1:27:24 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 15 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 8/10/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Lucky Yellow Marble (Video)

    08/09/2018 9:04:36 AM PDT · by Swordmaker · 9 replies
    BigGeekDad ^ | also unknown | unknown, unfortunately
    Watch this lucky yellow marble navigate through a course of blocks and other objects in tune to the song Eine Kleine Nachtmusik by Mozart. The creator of this video is very patient as it took over a month to make and about 300 failed recordings of the music. I find it mesmerizing to watch the yellow marble as it seems like it will surely get stuck or fall off course somewhere along the way. If you enjoyed this cool video then you might also like to watch Marbles and Magnets and Music. Lucky Yellow Marble.