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Humor (General/Chat)

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  • Satire. Poll Finds Most People OK With Raising Taxes On Other People

    01/17/2019 8:20:41 AM PST · by gattaca · 13 replies
    U.S.—In a stunning new poll, Americans indicated they are OK with a 70% marginal tax rate, indicating that since the hefty taxes would only apply to other people and not themselves, they are alright with the extremely high taxes. "See, a lot of people think the proposed 70% tax rate is way too high," said one woman in California. "But what they don't understand is that the 70% is only on really rich people---in other words, not me. Let's crank it up to 90, 100, or 110% even. I don't mind in the slightest." Americans all over the country suggested...
  • Today's Toons 1/17/19

    01/17/2019 2:32:42 AM PST · by pookie18 · 9 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 1/17/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • ..No Longer Tolerate A System Where The Rich Get Richer And The Poor Also Get Richer-SATIRE

    01/16/2019 7:39:55 PM PST · by fungoking · 2 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | 1/16/19 | Staff
    We Can No Longer Tolerate An Economic System Where The Rich Get Richer And The Poor Also Get Richer An op-ed by Bernie Sanders Capitalism has failed us. The year is [editor please insert current year here], and we still have an economic system where the rich people just continue to get richer, while the poor suffer by also getting richer. We must look to socialism for a more equitable system, one in which there are no upper or lower classes---well, at least one in which there is no upper class. We must look to socialism, where wealth isn't created...
  • 'Terrorist Droppings' in N.M. Desert indicate need for protection, says Pelosi (humor/satire)

    01/16/2019 4:55:22 PM PST · by topher · 2 replies
    [Based on information from Washington Examiner article but Satire/Humor: '{Lordsburg, N.M.} Border rancher: 'We’ve found prayer rugs out here. It’s unreal'' --] Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi wants to use the Endangered Species Act to protect the endangered Syrian ISIS Terrorist critter, Somali ISIS Terrorist critter, Kenyan Al-Shabaab critter, Iranian Al Qaeda critter as well as the Iranian ISIS critter. The prayer rug droppings of these critters have been found by farmers/ranchers in the Lordsburg, New Mexico area. Many ranchers/farmers, as well as other US citizens feel these varmits are nothing but pests and should be exterminated...
  • Dog puts fisherman's RV in reverse, backs it into Lake Sam Rayburn

    01/16/2019 3:45:37 PM PST · by lowbridge · 42 replies ^ | January 9, 2019 | Raegan Gibson
    A professional fisherman got a big surprise as he tried to launch his boat at Lake Sam Rayburn to practice for a fishing tournament this past weekend. Eric Jackson, of Rock Island, TN, told 12News his two-year-old Dalmatian, Bodi, stepped on the gear shift switch, putting the 38-foot RV in reverse.  Jackson says he was on the back bumper unloading his boat when the RV began backing into the lake. Jackson had been working to launch his boat at the ramps at the Umphrey Family Pavillion of Highway 255. He was planning a practice day before the Fishing League Worldwide 2019...
  • Today's Toons 1/16/19

    01/16/2019 3:20:19 AM PST · by pookie18 · 17 replies
    The Politics Forums ^ | 1/16/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • NFL LIVE THREAD: Conference Championships

    01/15/2019 11:05:44 PM PST · by Impy · 45 replies
    NFL LIVE THREAD: Conference Championships SUNDAY, JAN 20, 2019 (All Times Eastern) NFC: #2 Los Angeles Rams at #1 New Orleans Saints 3:05 PM on FOX, Mercedes-Benz Superdome AFC: #2 New England Patriots at #1 Kansas City Chiefs 6:40 pm on CBS, Arrowhead Stadium
  • Sign up for the Texas Marathon

    01/15/2019 4:09:46 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 17 replies
    email | 1/15/2019 | unknown
    Due to the popularity of the TV "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas-Style!" The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas, drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, then over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, and Amarillo. From there they will go on to Abilene and Fort Worth. Finally, back to Dallas. Each contestant will be driving a pink Prius with 15 bumper stickers which will read: 1. "I'm A Democrat" 2. "Amnesty For Illegals" 3. "I Love The Dixie Chicks"...
  • Today's Toons 1/15/19

    01/15/2019 3:34:19 AM PST · by pookie18 · 19 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 1/15/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Today's Toons 1/14/19

    01/14/2019 3:40:36 AM PST · by pookie18 · 15 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 1/14/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Woman banned from Walmart after riding cart while drinking wine from Pringles can, police say

    01/13/2019 8:44:19 AM PST · by rdl6989 · 53 replies ^ | Jan 12, 2019 | Jared Leone, Cox Media Group National Content Desk
    WICHITA FALLS, Texas - Police were called to a Texas Walmart after a woman was reportedly drinking wine from a Pringles can and riding an electric cart in the parking lot.
  • 25 Of The Worst Food Name Fails Ever

    01/13/2019 12:32:14 AM PST · by Oshkalaboomboom · 43 replies
    BoredPanda ^ | Jan. 12, 2019 | Lina D.
    We’re pretty picky about how our food is packaged – choosing the wrong name, packaging color or logo can scare us away from a product. You’d think that a food company would want to do some research to make sure that their product isn’t ridiculed or doesn’t seem repulsive, but judging by these food name package design fails, some of these guys don’t seem to have gotten that memo. Some of these are translation fails – we can only hope that that Chinese food company isn’t selling shredded children and that it was actually a funny fail. Others, like the...
  • Satire: Church Greeters Stationed At Southern Border To Deter Immigrants

    01/12/2019 11:22:04 PM PST · by gattaca · 14 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | January 10, 2019 | Babylon Bee
    TEXAS—In an innovative new plan to deter illegal immigrants from crossing into our country, church greeters are being stationed along the border, smiling and stretching out their hands to cheerily greet anyone who approaches. The excitable, impossibly peppy greeters will chase down Mexican immigrants in order to shake their hand, welcome them to the country, and give them a bulletin and church swag, inevitably prompting the frightened immigrants to run away as fast as they can. "Welcome to America, we're so glad to have you with us this morning. How has your week been?" they'll recite dutifully to each approaching...
  • Flat Earther & Sovereign Citizen Meets Veteran Cop

    01/12/2019 8:10:17 PM PST · by NRx · 11 replies
    YouTube ^ | 12-13-2018 | Inside The Badge Channel
    If stupidity were a virtue this guy would become the first man to be declared a saint while still alive.
  • Would Jesus Wear A Rolex?

    01/12/2019 11:15:40 AM PST · by OddLane · 104 replies
    Youtube ^ | Youtube
    A classic, increasingly relevant, tune sung by Ray Stevens.
  • Saturday Smile

    01/12/2019 4:52:32 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 13 replies
    email | 1/12/2019 | unknown
    A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail into the 2x4 just above the cow's stall in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?" The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. “I came to inseminate the cow,” he said. Amy takes him down to the...
  • This Delayed Traveler's 4-hour Dance Around the Atlanta Airport Is Going Viral

    01/11/2019 11:52:02 PM PST · by blueplum · 25 replies
    MSN Travel Leisure ^ | 11 Jan 2019 | Cailey Rizzo
    Sometimes there’s just nothing left for you to do but dance. Over the past few weeks, the government shutdown has caused aggravation at airports around the country. Earlier this week, Katie Gould, a law student, was stranded at Hartsfield Jackson Atlanta International Airport....{snip} It was four hours until Gould could board the next flight to Milwaukee. Instead of killing time watching TV like she normally does, Gould turned the delay into an opportunity.
  • Huge Amazon Package : Jeff Bezos sent X-rated photos of his ‘big’ willy to Lauren Sanchez

    01/11/2019 6:41:00 PM PST · by libh8er · 106 replies
    UK Sun ^ | 1.11.2019 | Jon Lockett
    AMAZON boss Jeff Bezos sent a photograph of his "big" willy to lover Lauren Sanchez in a string of sex text messages, it's been claimed. The tech tycoon - worth a staggering $140bn - also reportedly told the married TV star he was "full of love" for her and wanted to wake her up "and not be quite so gentle" with her. In addition to shirtless photographs, he is also said to have sent Sanchez an "unsparing" photograph of his genitals and 'sexts' which were apparently too graphic to publish, according to a National Enquirer source speaking to the New...
  • A Few Friday Funnies

    01/11/2019 7:38:48 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 11 replies
    emails | 1/11/2019 | several
    1.Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written An impressive new book. It's called ........ 'Ministers Do More Than Lay People' 2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink And be Mary.. 3. The difference between the Pope and Your boss, the Pope only expects you To kiss his ring. 4. My mind works like lightning, One brilliant Flash and it is gone. 5. The only time the world beats a path to Your door is if you're in the bathroom. 6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and That...
  • Today's Toons 1/11/19

    01/11/2019 3:40:40 AM PST · by pookie18 · 27 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 1/11/19 | pookie18
    Click on link